Tuesday, 2 April 2013

Aim!! Fire!!

I have been battling with some awful pigeon pests for a while now.
Rumour has it, that "some guy" came into the neighbourhood and released these birds. I tend to believe the rumour since they did not arrive one by one, but it seemed like one day a whole multitude of these big nasty birds invaded the area.
They're the ones that have bullied the docile doves out of their nesting area above my kitchen roof.  Marauders to the highest degree.
No more "Coo!", "Coo!" "Coo!" on mornings, just big piles of bird SH#%$&*T on the freshly scrubbed pavement after their "Aim!"   "Fire!" tactics.
Many mornings they have narrowly missed me as I opened my kitchen door.  Another 1/30th of a second, and I would be a perfect target I assure you.
It's almost as if they knew the time I'd be opening the door, even if I turned the key as quietly as possible.
Probably waiting on me for target practice.
"Here she comes!!!  Get ready!!  Aim!!!   Fire!!!"
The biggest smelliest pile of crap from about seven of them every morning. What's a girl to do?  

They have the meanest baddest looks I have ever seen in any bird in my life. I'm sure the poor doves were scared out of their wits by these big "maguffies."(*)
Today, I'd had enough.
Out came my tall ladder....

Tall ladder to the rescue

.....however, when I started to climb up the ladder, the high winds that have been wreaking havoc on the island these past few days, almost blew me off, I swear...or maybe it was my imagination, but I don't like the idea of swaying around on a ladder in the wind.
Those varmits would have laughed their heads off if I'd fallen off the ladder...I think I hear the manic laughter now ringing in my ears. We couldn't have that now, could we?
Climbed back down and decided to wait until my friends came by to visit to seek their help.
Thank goodness for good friends.........good male friends who are not afraid of heights and swaying ladders.
 My poor palms suffered many splotches of excrement for too long

Imagine those brutes had pulled aside the barbed/chicken wire which had been attached to the roof fascia board to keep them out.
I had previously pulled away as much of the nest as I could reaching up with a long-handled rake.
Today, only the remnants remained, and so the area was quickly cleaned, and a liberal sprinkling of black pepper on the area to keep the pests away. 
  Remnants of the nest along with a broken egg shell
Now, don't get me all wrong, I'm an avid animal lover, but this was just too much...they had to move on.
They love hanging out on my neighbour's house, and I think they can stay over there.

(*) Maguffy- a person in authority, a meanie, a bully.


  1. Oh that bird poo is full of phosphorus - they might have been doing you a favour! :)

    1. I'll continue to purchase my phosphorus thank you.
      I smiled after I read your comment, since it was only yesterday I fertilized my palms with Nitrophoska Blue.

  2. Had you read my Eagleton Notes in years past you would know that pigeons are definitely not my favourite bird! You have my sympathy.

    1. I know you share my sentiments on these pests....thanks.


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